Happy Hour: HOLIDAY HORROR🎅🏼🎄

Good evening everyone! Yes, I know it is Tuesday, but if you did not read last week's blog, I will be in Cancun for the rest of the year, basking in the sun. I leave this week, so I have no time to create a post on Thursday 🙁

But, on the bright side, Kohls stores will be open 24 hours starting Thursday! It's a good idea for people who

have insomnia or need to sneak shop a gift for someone. Rest in peace retail workers (been there, done that), HELLLOOOO shopping with my rewards at 3:42 a.m.

If only Target stores were 24/7 😔😒

This week's and this year's final Happy Hour Story (until next year) is ALL about Holiday Horror! I have never had a 'horror' experience on a holiday, more of a "let's never relive that again" kind of holiday experience. I've seen parents fight for the last toy at Walmart and someone ended up getting tased, but I have never been that person. I will do one Christmas and one New Years story, maybe two if I still feel like typing by that point.

CHRISTMAS HORROR STORY:

I once got a severe flu and my entire family and I were sick, but I really do not remember that, since I was 3 years old. BUT, there is a day after Christmas; the 26th, AKA the day people blow Christmas money or the second Black Friday. My mom, sister, and I went to the nearest mall to us at the time, which was 30 minutes away. We shopped and had ice cream, then we somehow ended up at the pet store at the mall and we ended up adopting a baby Ferret (In Arizona, it is legal to own ferrets). We already had a ferret, his name was Ferry, and then we adopted the baby, Mocha. There is Ferry and Mocha. Although, we got

Ferry when he was an adult. Never did we guess that baby ferrets are EXTREMELY hyper. She ended up being A LOT of trouble, she broke so many appliances and they both ended up smelling awful, so we gave Mocha to one of my friends after Ferry passed away. A week later, she ended giving rid of Mocha. I took that photo during my cringe era, so enjoy this photo I found of me at the age 11 that looks like I was dug out of a failed meme trash bin. Gross.

At the time I suffered from an eating disorder and a serious fashion mishap. But hey, I brought chokers back.

NEW YEARS HORROR STORY:

New Years is one of the days I refuse to drive next to the 4th of July, Black Friday, and Halloween. I feel that right now is the perfect time to tell the horror story of the time I accidentally got drunk. I swear upon my dog's grave that IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. Quick back story, I was at a New Year's party with my friend's and a**hole ex, ALL of my friends are older than me, 98% of my friends are over the age 21. My mom drove me to their house to go to a Mansion party. Well that got canceled out because you really can't be the DD when you're 15 years old and a bunch of 21 years olds are off the walls sh*t faced. So we stayed at their house. I was really thirsty and I was too embarrassed to search for cup to pour water in. I saw a clear glass of liquid on the counter, filled all the way to the top (who fills up vodka to the top of the cup?!), it didn't smell like alcohol, so I began to chug it. It tasted stale, but I then spotted an opened bottle of Ginger Ale. I thought it was Stale ginger ale. I was halfway finished with the glass and I suddenly felt as if someone flipped me over, my arms went numb, and my feet felt tingly. I practically fell, my ex caught me, and I was on the couch with my friends surrounding me, freaking out, and they kept giving me warm glasses of water. I sobered up, and I WAS PISSED. Because who THE HELL fills up a glass of just alcohol?! 😑🤦🏽‍♀️Clearly someone who hates their life. After I sobered up, my ex was more of a dick when he was drunk, he invited his ex and they ended up making out and I ended up passing out on the couch with his adorable puppy Rottweiler and then his ex girlfriend that he kissed woke me up for the new year (she is actually a REALLY nice girl). My mom picked me up an hour later, I told her everything, and she gave me the wonderful lecture of "Ask what it is before you try" conversation.

It's a fun story to look back and laugh and cry about to be honest.

That is it for this week and this year's happy hour story! Stay tuned on the first Thursday of 2018 for a big announcement and the first Happy Hour story of the year! Have a wonderful and safe Holiday. I send warm wishes and hot coco to you and your family. Until next year, Bonvoyage!

-c.o